In the face of a highly toxic marriage lasting 14 years, I endured various forms of abuse, with the only bright spots being the births of my children, Gracyn (now 15) and Griffin (8). Summoning the courage to break free, I filed for divorce, overcoming the fear of potential joint custody. The thought of not having my children with me daily was unimaginable.
Amidst this challenging period, I experienced the devastating losses of my aunt to Steven Johnson syndrome, my grandfather to lung cancer, and the most painful of all, my mother to bone cancer—all within a few short years. These profound losses left me grappling with grief.
Enter NuSkin, a turning point in my life. While working as a marketing manager, struggling to make ends meet and selling items around my house just to make a dollar, I discovered NuSkin. This opportunity proved to be a blessing, fitting seamlessly into my life as a single mom. The flexibility, coupled with the ability to work from anywhere using just my phone, was transformative. I knew if I had the right mindset I would succeed, I decided so.
Within eight months of joining NuSkin, I made the courageous decision to quit my day job. Now, I am my own boss, living life on my own terms, and debt-free. I have the freedom to
travel the world every six months, thanks to earned trips, all while being 100% present for my children. In the end, I realized that memories are our most precious possessions,
and I am committed to providing my children with the best childhood possible.
At-Home Spa Night:
Create a relaxing spa experience at home with inexpensive face masks, bath salts, and scented candles. Take a soothing bath or shower to unwind from the day's stress.
Nature Walks:
Explore local parks or nature trails for a refreshing and budget-friendly outdoor activity.
Spending time in nature can be rejuvenating and provide a mental break.
Mindfulness and Meditation:
Practice mindfulness and meditation to reduce stress and increase mental clarity.
Use free apps or online resources for guided meditation sessions.
Exercise at Home:
Utilize free workout videos on platforms like YouTube for home exercise routines.
Engage in activities like yoga or bodyweight exercises for physical and mental health.
Library Retreat:
Take advantage of your local library for a peaceful reading retreat.
Borrow books, join reading clubs, or attend library events for intellectual stimulation.
DIY Home Spa:
Create your own DIY beauty treatments using natural ingredients from your kitchen.
Make homemade scrubs, masks, and hair treatments for a pampering session.
Social Connections:
Plan budget-friendly outings with friends or family, such as picnics or potluck dinners.
Prioritize social connections for emotional support and shared experiences.
Online Courses and Learning:
Explore free or low-cost online courses to pursue personal interests or career development. Enhancing your skills can boost confidence and open up new opportunities.
Journaling:
Start a journal to express thoughts and feelings.
Journaling can be a therapeutic and cost-free way to reflect on experiences.
Budget-Friendly Hobbies:
Explore low-cost hobbies like drawing, writing, or gardening.
Pursuing creative outlets can be fulfilling and enjoyable without breaking the bank.
Volunteer Work:
Get involved in local community service or volunteer work.
Helping others can provide a sense of purpose and fulfillment.
Free Community Events:
Attend free community events, such as concerts, festivals, or workshops.
Check local calendars for budget-friendly activities and entertainment.
Remember, self-care doesn't always have to come with a price tag. By incorporating these affordable strategies into your routine, you can prioritize your well-being without compromising your budget.
Mindful Breathing:
Practice deep, intentional breathing to center yourself.
Take a few minutes each day to focus on your breath, inhaling and exhaling slowly.
Daily Gratitude Practice:
Reflect on the positive aspects of your life each day.
Keep a gratitude journal and write down three things you're grateful for.
Mindful Moments with Children:
Fully engage in quality time with your children.
Be present and savor the small, joyful moments you share with them.
Guided Meditation:
Use guided meditation apps or online resources.
Find short sessions that fit into your schedule, focusing on relaxation and stress relief.
Mindful Walking:
Take mindful walks to clear your mind.
Pay attention to your surroundings, the sensation of each step, and your breath.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT):
Embrace the concept of accepting what you cannot change.
Focus on actions aligned with your values despite life's challenges.
Mindful Eating:
Pay attention to the flavors, textures, and smells of your food.
Practice mindful eating to enhance your connection with nourishment.
Digital Detox:
Set boundaries for screen time, especially on social media.
Take breaks from electronic devices to reduce information overload.
Self-Compassion Practices:
Treat yourself with kindness and understanding.
Practice self-compassion by acknowledging your efforts and challenges.
Social Support:
Connect with other single moms for support.
Share experiences, seek advice, and build a network of understanding friends.
Time Management Techniques:
Break tasks into smaller, manageable steps.
Prioritize and organize your time to reduce feelings of overwhelm.
Laughter Therapy:
Find moments of humor in everyday life. Laughing can release endorphins and
alleviate stress.
Consistency is key when integrating mindfulness and stress management into your routine. Experiment with different techniques to find what works best for you, and don't hesitate to seek additional support when needed.
Co-parenting with a narcissist has been one of the most challenging experiences I've faced. Their manipulative and self-centered behavior can make it incredibly tough to navigate
shared parenting responsibilities. Here are some practical tips I've learned along the way to help you navigate this difficult situation:
1. Set Boundaries
- Establish Clear Boundaries: Clearly define and enforce boundaries regarding communication and interactions. Be firm and consistent.
- Stick to the Parenting Plan: Follow the agreed-upon parenting plan rigorously to minimize conflicts and misunderstandings.
2. Limit Contact
- Use Written Communication: Whenever possible, communicate through email or text to have a written record of all interactions. This can also help reduce emotional stress.
- Keep Conversations Short and Focused: Keep your communications brief and to the point, focusing only on the children and their needs.
3. Document Everything
- Keep Detailed Records: Document all interactions, including dates, times, and content of conversations, as well as any incidents that occur.
- Save All Correspondence: Maintain copies of all emails, texts, and other communications.
4. Manage Expectations
- Accept Reality: Understand that a narcissist is unlikely to change their behavior. Accepting this can help you manage your expectations and reduce frustration.
- Focus on What You Can Control: Concentrate on your own actions and responses rather than trying to change the narcissist’s behavior.
5. Stay Calm and Neutral
- Avoid Emotional Reactions: Narcissists often try to provoke emotional responses. Stay calm and neutral, and do not engage in arguments or emotional outbursts.
- Practice Self-Control: Take a deep breath and pause before responding to any provocative statements or actions.
6. Protect Your Children
- Prioritize Your Children’s Well-Being: Make decisions that are in the best interests of your children, even if it means compromising in certain areas.
- Shield Them from Conflict: Avoid discussing co-parenting conflicts in front of your children and do not involve them in adult issues.
7. Seek Support
- Build a Support Network: Surround yourself with supportive friends, family, or support groups who understand your situation and can provide emotional support.
- Consider Professional Help: A therapist or counselor can provide strategies and support for dealing with the challenges of co-parenting with a narcissist.
8. Know Your Legal Rights
- Consult with a Lawyer: Understand your legal rights and options. Consult with a family lawyer to ensure you are taking the right steps to protect yourself and your children.
- Consider Mediation or Court Intervention: If necessary, seek mediation or court intervention to resolve disputes and enforce the parenting plan.
9. Focus on Self-Care
- Take Care of Your Mental Health: Make time for self-care activities that help you relax and recharge. Managing stress is crucial for your well-being.
- Stay Healthy: Maintain a healthy lifestyle, including regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep, to keep your energy levels up and reduce stress.
By implementing these tips, you can better manage the challenges of co-parenting with a narcissist and create a more stable and positive environment for your children.
Create a Budget:
Establish a detailed budget that outlines your income, expenses, and savings goals.
Identify areas where you can cut costs and redirect funds toward savings.
I personally cut so much out in the beginning to be able to get back on my feet.
Emergency Fund:
Build an emergency fund to cover unexpected expenses.
Aim for at least three to six months' worth of living expenses in your emergency fund.
Set Financial Goals:
Define short-term and long-term financial goals. Prioritize goals such as debt reduction, homeownership, education savings, and retirement. I suggest writing these goals down and hanging them up around your house so you see them everywhere and they are constantly on the forefront of your mind.
Increase Your Income:
Explore opportunities to increase your income, such as part-time work, freelancing, or side gigs. Invest in upgrading your skills to enhance your career prospects. Having multiple streams of income is the smart way to go. I'll go more into depth on this topic later.
Debt Management:
Develop a plan to pay off high-interest debt systematically.
Consider consolidating loans or negotiating with creditors for more favorable terms.
Live Below Your Means:
Embrace a frugal lifestyle by living below your means. Prioritize needs over wants and avoid unnecessary debt.
Save for Retirement:
Contribute to a retirement savings account, such as a 401(k) or IRA.
Take advantage of employer-sponsored retirement plans if available.
Insurance Coverage:
Ensure you have adequate insurance coverage for health, life, and property.
Shop around for the best rates to save on insurance premiums.
Childcare Assistance:
Investigate childcare assistance programs or subsidies that may be available in your area.
Collaborate with other single parents for mutual childcare support.
Negotiate Expenses:
Negotiate bills and monthly expenses, such as rent, utilities, and insurance.
Seek discounts and explore ways to reduce fixed costs.
Build Credit Responsibly:
Establish and maintain good credit by paying bills on time. Monitor your credit score
and report for any discrepancies.
I got a secure credit card, a $300 limit and put only my Netflix bill on there monthly.
I made sure to pay it off each month and by doing this my credit score jumped!
Network and Seek Support:
Connect with other single moms for advice and support.
Explore community resources, nonprofit organizations, and government programs.
Negotiate Work Benefits:
Negotiate work benefits, such as flexible schedules or work-from-home options.
Explore employer-sponsored programs for financial assistance.
Remember, financial independence is a journey, and progress may take time. Be patient, stay focused on your goals, and celebrate small victories along the way.
Empowering yourself to reach your fullest potential involves fostering continuous personal growth and development. This section provides resources and guidance to help you enhance your skills, pursue your passions, and achieve your personal and professional goals.
1. Educational Resources
2. Skill Enhancement
3. Pursuing Passions
4. Personal Development Plans
5. Support Networks
By focusing on personal growth and development, you'll provide yourself with
the tools and inspiration you need to continually evolve and thrive, both personally
and professionally.
Freelance Services:
Offer freelance services in your area of expertise, such as writing, graphic design, social media management, or consulting.
Platforms like Upwork and Fiverr can help you find clients.
Online Retail:
Start an e-commerce business selling products through platforms like Etsy, eBay, or Amazon.
Consider crafting handmade items, vintage goods, or dropshipping.
Virtual Assistance:
Provide virtual assistant services to businesses or entrepreneurs.
Offer administrative support, email management, or customer service.
Consulting:
Share your expertise by offering consulting services.
This could include business consulting, career coaching, or specialized advice in your field.
Online Courses and Coaching:
Create and sell online courses or coaching services.
Share your knowledge in areas such as parenting, personal development, or a skill you've mastered.
Blogging or Vlogging:
Start a blog or YouTube channel around a topic you are passionate about.
Monetize through ads, sponsorships, and affiliate marketing.
Childcare Services:
Provide in-home childcare services for parents in your community.
Offer flexible hours to accommodate working parents.
Fitness or Wellness Coaching:
Become a fitness or wellness coach, offering personalized plans and guidance.
Conduct sessions online or in-person.
Event Planning:
Start an event planning business for parties, weddings, or corporate events.
Build a network of vendors and venues to offer comprehensive services.
Social Media Management:
Offer social media management services to businesses looking to enhance their online presence.
Create and curate content, schedule posts, and engage with the audience.
Cleaning Services:
Start a residential or commercial cleaning business.
Offer flexible scheduling to accommodate clients' needs.
Real Estate:
Explore opportunities in real estate, such as property management, real estate investment, or becoming a real estate agent.
Consider virtual options if on-site commitments are challenging.
Catering or Meal Prep Services:
Start a catering or meal prep business, providing convenient and healthy options for busy individuals or families.
Advertise through local channels and social media.
Home Renovation or Decorating:
Offer home renovation or decorating services.
Develop a portfolio showcasing your skills and style.
Affiliate Marketing:
Build a niche website or blog and monetize through affiliate marketing.
Promote products or services and earn commissions on sales.
Digital Marketing Services:
Provide digital marketing services, including social media marketing, SEO, or email marketing.
Help businesses enhance their online presence.
Mobile Beauty Services:
Offer mobile beauty services, such as hairstyling or makeup application.
Cater to clients at their convenience.
When considering entrepreneurial opportunities, it's important to choose a venture that aligns with your skills, interests, and the time you can commit. Additionally, researching the market and understanding your target audience will contribute to the success of your business.
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